Honda is about to introduce a “personal mobility device” that looks like a unicycle but behaves more like a Segway. Its top speed, according to the company, is 6 kilometers an hour. Which translates to about 3.5 miles an hour. Which translates to the pace a reasonably fit person walks. Which means that reasonably fit people won’t use them to get from their cars to wherever else they’re going, and the unreasonably fit who do will become the increasingly unfit. Just what we need. I mean, it’s not like we have an obesity problem or anything.
There’s no place like home.
Al Qaeda’s Yemeni affiliate has released a new English-language training manual that offers American would-be jihadis details on what to expect when they join al Qaeda, but recommends that they consider staying home and “attacking America in its own backyard.”
Written by U.S.-raised al Qaeda propagandist Samir Khan, who was killed in a 2011 drone strike, “Expectations Full” tells Western recruits what hardships they can expect to encounter when they arrive at training camps in Yemen and other Muslim countries, from physical training and outdoor living to dealing with wounds.
Presumably the manual was written before Khan died. If so, Randy Kreider of ABC News might want to rephrase: “Written by U.S.-raised al Qaeda propagandist Samir Khan before he was killed…” If not, then he buried the lede.
“Many Muslims dream of making it to the front lines of jihad,” says the foreword. “In this document, the writer gives his fellow Muslim a sense of what the life of a mujahid would be during the twenty-first century.”
It seems that not everyone gets to enjoy the joy and glory of suicide bombings and beheadings. There’s grunt work, too.
Khan suggests that in order to experience what life can be like in a training camp, aspiring jihadis practice going a week without using any electronic equipment, talking above a low voice or leaving their apartment.
In other words, a Buddhist retreat.
There turns out to be little that can prepare the aspiring jihadist for what to expect when he meets the 72 virgins upon his arrival in paradise, though Khan does recommend season tickets to Ann Arbor Women’s Rugby.
Three high-ranking JPMorgan Chase executives connected to the trading snafu that cost the bank $2 billion were just shown the door.
Two billion dollars! Two effin’ billion dollars. That’s a lot of money. Gone. Disappeared. Poof. Someone has to pay the price for such carelessness. There must be accountability.
On the other hand, $2 billion is what the the United States has to borrow every 12 hours just to keep up with spending. So presumably heads are rolling. Right?
As Stalin said: One debt is a tragedy; 17.6 trillion debts is a statistic.
I wonder if there’s a Hallmark card for this.
A Santa Ana woman accused of having unlawful sexual intercourse with her daughter’s teenage boyfriend is scheduled to be arraigned Friday.
Investigators suspect that Mayra Gonzalez, 32, also gave birth to the teen’s baby, said Cpl. Anthony Bertagna of the Santa Ana Police Department. The Orange County District Attorney’s Office has accused Gonzalez of having sex with the boy on six occasions between July 1, 2011, and Dec. 24, 2011, the Orange County district attorney’s office said.
Neighbors at Gonzalez’s apartment complex alerted the boy’s parents about the relationship, police said.
Gonzalez told police when she was arrested that she was in love with the 16-year-old boy.
The only real unusual part of this story, which is after all becoming kinda sorta commonplace, is that Gonzales isn’t a teacher.
Whew, that’s a relief.
The earliest known Mayan calendar has been found in an ancient house in Guatemala and it offers no hint that the world’s end is imminent, researchers said Thursday.
This is good news for Harold Camping, who won’t have to complete his conversion to Mayan–but bad news for the “researchers” who now have to scramble for next year’s grants.
The question still not answered is why so many people seem to take end-of-world prophecies made long ago without science or reason more seriously than they do end-of-America prophecies made today by economists frightened by our slow growth and unsustainable debt. Would it help to point out that the Mayans invented the number zero?
They’re just wild about Angry Birds.
MIAMI (AP) — The 8-year-old twins love their iPad. They draw, play games and expand their vocabulary. Their family’s teenagers also like the hand-held computer tablets, too, but the clan’s elders show no interest.
The orangutans at Miami’s Jungle Island apparently are just like people when it comes to technology. The park is one of several zoos experimenting with computers and apes, letting its six orangutans use an iPad to communicate and as part of a mental stimulus program. Linda Jacobs, who oversees the program, hopes the devices will eventually help bridge the gap between humans and the endangered apes.
“Our young ones pick up on it. They understand it. It’s like, ‘Oh I get this,’” Jacobs said. “Our two older ones, they just are not interested. I think they just figure, ‘I’ve gotten along just fine in this world without this communication-skill here and the iPad, and I don’t need a computer.’”
Alas, the iPads are wifi only. Orangutans are notorious for exceeding their 4G data plans.
